Mental wellness and painful emotions go hand in hand with your overall well-being. What comes to mind when you hear the word, “emotions?” If life presently has you on the mountaintop, you may experience a warm fuzzy feeling when you think of the word, “emotions”. But many times we are not on that mountain. Most often we are in the valley. If you are currently struggling through distressing circumstances, you may feel some anxiety, unhappiness, or loneliness when you hear the word, “emotions”. Connecting your emotions and mental wellness may give you a path out of your dark valley.
Emotions Are a Gift From God
Emotions in themselves are neither good nor bad, they are simply part of our humanity. God created us as human beings with a body, soul, and spirit. With our bodies, we interact with creation through our five senses. Our soul, which includes our mind, will, and emotions, enables interaction with each other and creation, as we think, feel, and make decisions. With our spirit, we interact with God.
God gave us emotions so we can experience life on every level. And He said, “This is very good”. Going through life, not being able to feel anything, simply isn’t normal. Imagine trying to have a relationship with someone who doesn’t have any responses. It would be a very shallow relationship. So, we have shown that connecting your emotions and mental wellness is a good thing.
Now if we lived in a perfect world we would only need to feel positive emotions such as happiness, joy, love, and excitement. But because we live in a fallen state of humanity we get hurt by others and circumstances, resulting in feeling negative emotions. Negative emotions can generally be grouped into three categories. The painful emotions, the deep emotions, and the turbulent emotions.
Painful emotions are those which flood out of us at inconvenient times, such as grief, brokenness, and depression. Deep emotions are those which only we are aware of. They are the feelings that needle us when we are alone or trying to sleep such as confusion, loneliness, guilt, and shame. And then there are the turbulent emotions which include fear, terror, anger, rage, and worthlessness. They are considered turbulent because of their strong potency and unpredictable nature in the way in which they are acted upon. Here again, we see connecting your emotions and mental wellness.
Mental Wellness Painful Emotions
Painful emotions are those which come to the surface at inconvenient times and cause embarrassment. Loss causes grief. Grief suppressed produces brokenness. Brokenness left unattended promotes depression. Depression births hopelessness.
You wonder-
- What is it that brought me to this place?
- Where do I run to?
- How do I find the words to explain something I don’t understand?
- Who can I talk to, who won’t think I have gone mad?
“Emotional pain”, the very words evoke a disturbing response for individuals who have suffered extensively. They feel alone in their suffering; because they are. No two people experience loss or brokenness in the same way. No one can rightly say, “I know how you feel”. Everyone is on their journey of mental wellness and emotions.
Painful emotions are those that people try to suppress to avoid attracting attention. They are the expressions of pain that cause observers to feel uncomfortable. Yet stories of survivors fill the shelves in bookstores and libraries. Why is it that readers are drawn to life experiences expressing pain and sorrow? Could it be, that everyone hurts?
The sources of emotional pain are many and vary in nature. Individuals grieve losses, suffer brokenness from painful memories, or struggle with depression resulting from a lifetime of tragedies. All of which boils down to excruciating emotional agony.
Mental Wellness and painful emotions must be understood if the sufferer is to increase in psychological health.
Deep Emotions
Deep emotions are those that are embedded in your character and may only be discerned by your closest friends or family. They are the ones that bother you when you are alone or trying to sleep. They prickle away at you, causing you to feel less than enough of one attribute or too much of another.
- Have you ever been deeply wounded?
- Has someone betrayed your trust?
- Do you have difficulty believing God loves you, even at your worst?
- Are you over-sensitive or easily offended?
- Do you have trust issues?
- Does loneliness shadow you?
- Is pleasing everyone all the time, a top priority for you?
- Do you never seem to be comfortable in your own skin?
These struggles are symptoms of emotional wounds.
Confusion, loneliness, false guilt, shame, and worthlessness were never God’s original design for you. These feelings are the aftermath of deep emotional wounds resulting from childhood trauma. Heartbreak often opens the door for Satan to have a foothold in your life. These disturbing emotions are tools of the enemy of your soul.
You are destined for greater purposes. You were created to be the object of God’s love. If you are a child of God, you are a new creation with a promising future. You can have victory over negative emotions when you make connecting your emotions and mental wellness a priority.
Turbulent Emotions
Turbulent emotions tend to feed off each other and are those which attract attention as they are acted upon. A self-image of worthlessness causes an individual to live in fear, which triggers the need to be in control of situations at all times. The inability to control circumstances produces frustration, fear, and anger. Anger not released appropriately gives birth to rage and hatred.
Worry, anxiety, and fear rob the sufferer of the freedom to enjoy life. Fear overpowers the choice to go out and have a good time as one waits for the next episode of despair. These painful emotions can get in the way of social activities and interpersonal relationships. The connection between emotions and mental wellness dictates the level of your stability.
Feelings of worthlessness greatly influence how one interacts with peers and superiors. Low self-worth often shows itself in the way one responds to overpowering relationships and attracts repeated abuse and disrespect from would-be bullies. A victim of repeated violence frequently becomes an offender as frustrations are turned toward weaker individuals.
- How individuals feel about their self-worth determines how they will interact with peers and superiors.
- Do you struggle with excessive anger or violence?
- Have you a need to control situations?
- Does fear keep you from doing the things you want to do?
- Are you frequently the object of peer mockery or bullying?
- Do you gossip, belittle, or bully, others emotionally?
- Are you involved in activities that cause self-harm?
These are indications that you are not happy with something about yourself or your situation. Possibly you’re not satisfied with the way God created you. Maybe you are disappointed with the family in which you were raised, or with the way, your life has turned out. God is a God of second chances. He knows how to heal and restore lives.
Connecting Your Mental Wellness and Painful Emotions
A similar traumatic childhood experience can manifest itself in various behaviors in different personality types. For one individual, a deep emotional wound may be the root cause of severe long-term depression, low self-worth, a love-hunger, or addictions. Yet for another person, the same type of wound may be the origin of violent fits of rage, bullying, controlling, hazardous lifestyle, overworking, or an inability to let others get close. Still, for other people, this same type of emotional wound may manifest itself through constant anxiety, fears, insecurity, isolation, loneliness, or eating disorders.
Deep, painful, turbulent emotions are a sign that something is hurting you. If you have experienced trauma that has been pushed down and not been released, your level of mental wellness will be affected. Powerful negative emotions will be triggered by present situations and you will re-live the emotions of the traumatic experience repeatedly. The connection between mental wellness and painful emotions is powerfully intertwined.
If these troublesome emotions control your life, there is hope. Your Heavenly Father can take your brokenness and rebuild you into His original design for you. He wants to heal you. Let Him do His work.
- Take your emotions to prayer and ask God to show you where these unwelcome feelings are rooted.
- Find a trustworthy friend you can talk to and begin sharing the traumatic experience.
- Allow yourself to feel your emotions
- Write out your feelings in a journal as a means of releasing the pain.
- Meditate on Scripture of God’s love for you.
- Pray for healing.
- Use my “Healing Emotional Wounds,” series, as a tool for your recovery journey.
Your past does not need to influence the success of your future. You can turn your mental wellness and painful emotions around, and stop the impact well-being.
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The Most Common Complaints in Relationships
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